Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize