oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Randomize
