Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
