I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
