Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
my god I love twenty year old dicks
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
