I cockslap morals
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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