I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
