And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
She bit a glass in half.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize