i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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