i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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