Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize
