He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I pour the whiskey from now on
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