Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
