But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
We have started to decorate penises.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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