I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
