Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
