those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
