Say something about gay babies.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
