"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Of course I have a pirate flag
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Randomize
