im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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