um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
it's like iHOP with fire
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize