Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
