They should really pass out barf bags in church
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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