Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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