Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Randomize
