shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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