I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
