Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
