My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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