he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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