porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
