He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize