It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
