Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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