it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
