He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
