Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize