You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
