Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
