I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
