im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
