In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Drunk is not a location!
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
