I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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