therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Randomize