dude i'm inner monologue high
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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