People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
