i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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