Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Randomize
