the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
