Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
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